New Priorities

I didn't do a post last week. It was a difficult week, full of stress and tears. I had two doctors appointments, one on Monday, then a follow up on Friday. I went to the gyn about what I thought was menopausal symptoms, but found out that there are other things going on that need further tests and possibly surgery. I can't talk about exactly what is going on yet, but I will soon. Let's just say it has changed a lot of priorities. I have to change my stress levels, my consumption habits and start an exercise routine. At this point, my life depends on it.

In my last post I mentioned feeling like I might die before I get to live. Well, now is the time and real, hard decisions must be made.

First, we are putting our house hunting on hold. The stress from this process needs to be reduced. We can't afford what is on the market right now. We are going to make where we live now more livable. So far we have bought a metal shelf to put all of the appliances that have been taking up all the room on our kitchen counter. We got that up over the weekend and it really has made a positive difference. Yesterday afternoon I was able to make bread for the week. We are still working on making the kitchen a space for all of the homemade products I love making.

Second, I am doing my juice/smoothie cleanse. The two appliances we made sure we could get to easily were the blender and juicer.

Third, I am delving deeply into the healing power of food. I am doing research right now, but as I read, I am making sure to include foods, spices and herbs to help me heal. Some of this I have known, but now I find it high importance to regaining control of my health.

Fourth, exercise. Even with this South Carolina summer heat, I have got to find routines to get me moving and increasing my mobility.

Fifth, sleep. I have got to get enough sleep to let my body heal and repair. It will help reduce stress and poor eating habits.

Sixth, read real books, not just read off the internet. Joe and I have wonderful, insightful books sitting on bookshelves collecting dust and not being of much use. Books on gardening, homesteading, arts/crafts, healthy cooking, and other books for fun. The last book I read was back in January. Our minds need to be stimulated and not numbed by video games and tv.

Seventh, family. I love my family, but I have let them control too much of my life.

Eighth, work. I don't want to sit at this desk for the rest of my working life. We need the money this job provides, but it is part of the killing process that I am trying to reverse. There are just so many things I want to do with the rest of my life.

And the most important aspect in my life that I need change is faith. Putting it in things or people has tripped me up so many times, yet I continue. Example: the right house will make us happy, the right outfit will make my boss like me, even the right camping trip will make our problems go away. None of that is true. That doesn't mean we can't have a house, but I mustn't pin hopes, dreams and future happiness on it. Things don't make us. God does.

I don't know what the future holds, I'm not even sure about the ride home. But my life needs a complete overhaul and anyone who says differently doesn't really care. They are just being a 'devil's advocate.' They have no place in my life. Period.

More to come.

Peace!